Friday, June 3, 2011

Giving up Fear

I'm been thinking a lot lately about why I do and don't do things. Questions like, "why is change so hard for me", "why haven't I gone to graduate school?" and "what should I be doing with my life/family right now?" These are deep questions that have given me much time to ponder on my reasons for the choices I make.

In all my deep pondering (much of which takes place in my car during my commute), I am coming to terms with the fact that I often let fear dictate my decisions, or lack thereof. I'm afraid of a change in our routine so I dismiss a new opportunity. I am unsure of the outcome of a change, so I resist making it. I'm paralyzed by the thought of choosing the "wrong" degree program so I haven't gone back to school. I could go on and on, but the bottom line is that fear is a primary consideration in my decision making.

I'm coming to realize that I've got to let go of fear. Fear is getting in the way of opportunities in my life. Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of mistakes. I'm trying to throw caution to the wind and do what I want, because I WANT to do it. If you know me, you know that I am a planner and don't do spontaneous very well, so this is an adjustment. I want to do things because they are right, not because they are comfortable.

Part of this paradigm shift has led us to getting a dog. It is also leading us to step out of our comfort zone on other things. It is helping me re-evaluate the why of my choices. My kids learn by example (whether I like it or not), and I don't want them to learn to simply take the path of least resistance in life. Being uncomfortable is the only way to grow.

Is there fear in your life holding you back? What have you done to conquer it?

4 comments:

Mary said...

Fear of failure is my #1 reason for not trying something. It can be truly terrifying for me to try something new without the knowledge that I'll do well.
I've learned to do all my research, and always have a back up plan so if I don't succeed, the world will not come to an end :o)
Find what is going to make you happy, and take your time. I hate being rushed into things and feeling unprepared!!

Kris said...

I love this. I'll need to ponder a bit.

Jessica G. said...

See? Dogs are the cure for everything! And I fear rejection - repeated, harsh rejection, which is why I haven't submitted any of my writing.

Jessica G. said...

Oh! And I got my bracelet! So cute and perfect! I love how it's just barely pink. Looks good with a lot of things. Thank YOU!